Tammy Peay

“STICKFLY”

Tammy Peay — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 17:40:45 +0000

I attended the Broadway play “STICKFLY” and I was sort of confused because of the title… I really didn’t know what to expect… I was more than pleasantly surprised that this play was more than I could have imagined. It wasn’t your typical musical with the slap stick jokes and offensive humor. There were no over the top actors… No fire works, special effects, no men in drag, nor any giant LCD screens. We have enough of those shows with the offensive type of comedy that lacks realism and substance. It was just a wonderful presentation of what America needs to see… Our lives thru creative but very realistic eyes… I was totally amazed by the way the writers told the story from several facets and made reflect contrast and dimension onto the next without distorting nor diluting the truth… Stickfly was witty, the dialogue was quick and kept you engaged. I laughed off my seat because I felt in the moment… I loved the way the cast pulled you in with them. It was a fantastic show that showed the lives of several people, from all walks of life, filling voids and learning life lessons on individual terms. I feel that this play with open minds and heart to seeing that we are not just singers and dancers. It gives the world an opportunity to see us in a different light. I will definitely go see this again!!! It was wonderful to see a real set, with real actors and a fabulous script!!! It was what Broadway needs… REAL THEATRE!!!!! Please go see this show… YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT!!!!

The Drama Queenz Fundraiser

Tammy Peay — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 16:52:53 +0000

I have to give credit where credit is due… The Drama Queenz gave the best caroling fundraiser ever!!! I was totally blown away with the Queenz this time!!! They had every base covered and the crowd was ready to fund raise and have fun as well!!! There was a raffle with great prizes, sexy Santa photos, plus a twenty dollar open bar and audience full of beautiful, talented singers who were more than willing to entertain the crowd. There was also a comedy show featuring Washington, DC’s very own, Sampson McCormick!!! He was hilarious!!! I know everyone enjoyed watching the familiar faces of Broadways’ who’s who showcase their smiles and voices!!! It was refreshing to party with a purpose!!! The Drama Queenz are trying to raise 50k to shoot a film entitled “Lanston’s”. These Queenz were there mixing and mingling with the crowd, but still very hands on and making sure that the event was a success!!! I had the opportunity to work with them once this year and I must admit… It was an amazing experience!!! I really enjoyed being a part of their cast!!! Please check them out on YOUTUBE!!! They’re sooooo ready for TV!!! I love them and I look forward to working with them in the future. THE DRAMA QUEENZ ARE SHINING STARZ!!!

Tammy Peay and DJ Baker of the Doo Dirty Talk Radio Show

WHAT???? SAY IT AIN’T SO!!!!!

Tammy Peay — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 00:13:15 +0000

Do you love a good cocktail and stimulating conversation with friends and loved ones? Do you love to relax with a glass of wine and a hot bath?? Do you love a glass of white wine with a delicious seafood dinner? Or how about a few glasses of red wine with youe favorite Italian dish? Do you get a shot of Patron or Remy to get the party started? Well, according to recent studies… Ladies, by consuming alcohol, you are increasing your chances of being a cancer victim by 57% or more. I had to take a seat… I couldn’t believe it!!! They didn’t say tequila or vodka… They said,”ALCOHOL”. I thought about all of my friends and family who aren’t alcoholics but they do enjoy a cocktail. Would this study change the nightlife and socializing as we know it? I wanted to see if people would respond to this new finding… I posted it on FB. IT DIDN’T GET ONE “COMMENT” NOR A SINGLE “LIKE”. I guess the ladies were either totally in denial or they are partying and enjoying life and not ready to give up the libations. I have never been a big drinker so, I am still drinking. LOL I have to admit… It’s always in the backof my mind. Ladies, Is the drink worth your life???

IF YOU CAN FORGET YESTERDAY…

Tammy Peay — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:41:37 +0000

Why do people stay stuck in the past? What has transpired in our past relationships effect them today?? Why can’t people seem to move on? What keeps then living in the past and reacting as if it just occurred? I believe that people keep hate and pain alive by not confronting the situation, not accepting what occurred and most of all not being able to truly forgive. I often hear people say…”I forgive but I’ll never forget…”. Is this really possible? Are we really forgiving the person if we put the deed, pain and feelings in our mental hard drive? I believe that people make mistakes and we will fall short as humans. We must be able to determine if the punishment suits the crime. Are we holding on to the misdemeanor offenses and handing down felony sentences?? Are we punishing our new love because of our past experiences with an ex? Do they deserve this?? NO, we must learn to treat each person as an individual. I had to focus on myself and only myself because that’s the only person I can control. I have the power to choose my friends, How I will allow them to treat me, and what I will give and what I will and will NOT take. I learnedI that I am totally in control!!! I also know from experience that I never knew how to truly forgive anyone. My Parents forced us to apologize for things because it was the right thing to to… Even if we weren’t really sorry… We said, “I’m sorry and held resentment long after the words were exchanged. carried this into my adulthood… Just apologizing to keep peace, when I knew I wasn’t remorseful and didn’t feel anything. I learned from my friend that forgiving a person who has wronged you benefits YOU. Once you truly forgive them… You will feel free and you will no longer carry the burden of their deeds in your heart. I’m not saying to put yourself in the same precarious situations with the same person that once jeopardized your happiness, safety health or wealth. You are to use common sense and precautions to protect yourself in case they slip back into their old ways… You will NOT be a casualty this time. Forgiving means to let go of the hurt and pain. Toss it behind you and don’t look back. Please know tat there is a lesson to be learned here… The past experience lets you know what to expect, what NOT to do with this person. Being forgiving doesn’t mean you are a fool who can be taken again… It means, I’ve moved on, I’m not angry, I know who you are and what you are capable of doing, and I will treat you with respect but I won’t put myself in the same position again. in other words… Redefine the relationship and set new boundaries that will protect you both from history repeating itself. So lets try to be forgiving and life a happier life. LOVE AND

WHEN LOVE DOESN’T LISTEN…

Tammy Peay — Sat, 26 Nov 2011 21:07:44 +0000

What do you do when love has hit a dead end due to lack of communication? What is happening when you feel love in your heart but both of you are spitting venom form your mouths? Where is the breakdown and can you mend the relationship? How do you get the relationship back on track? Is this possible? Some people will walk away as soon as things get a little rocky. I know that long term relationships are not always going to be rosey… There needs to be an understanding that there will be both good and bad days. You have to decide whether the relationship is worth salvaging. Does the good outweigh the bad? Is this a transient person or are they a life partner? If they aren’t a permanent fixture… It isn’t really worth the stress, headaches and heartaches? If the love is mutual and both parties are willing to humble themselves to hear and be heard. You both have to be willing to put in the work needed to save the relationship. One person can’t fight the battle alone. This means that both people have to humble themselves and be open to listen to constructive critism and realize that neither of you are perfect. You must respect boundaries and listen when someone tries to tell you what is not working for them. This is your time to listen to what is being said, Not use their platform to air your differences. This gives the person the indication that you are really NOT listening to them and their issue waas left unresolved. When you need to be heard… Your partner should do the same. My Mom and Dad would kneel facing each other, hold hands and look eye to eye when discussing their issues. This made it easier for them to feel like equals and somehow made it easier for them to effectively communicate. Both people also have to stop assuming what is being said to them, take time to listen and HEAR each other without being judgemental. If you need clarity… ASK QUESTIONS!!! DON’T ALWAYS ASSUME AND RESORT TO NEGATIVE THINKING. The same miscommunication that takes place when texting can happen when speaking. It’s very hard to communicate with anyone when they are being defensive and judgemental. It’s easy to judge others but very difficult to look at what part you are playing in the madness. Both parties must respect each other and what each person brings to the relationship. If you don’t respect your partner… It’s east to step all over their feelings without a second thought. I had always overlooked small things to keep peace but I soon realized that it was rapidly escalating and becoming worse over time. I had even tried to mirror the behavior directed towards me… Thinking that this would allow them to walk in my shoes… WRONG ANSWER! It was just making things worse for us. I learned that most rude folks can dish it out but can’t take it. I’d then decided to stand up for myself and say, “I don’t like how you are speaking to me and if you continue… I will NOT talk to you at all.” We are both alpha personalities and if someone doesn’t retreat… It will always be clash of the titans. I had no intentions on living in a war zone, So retreating was the only resort since being heard wasn’t an option. I wish I had a magical cure all for people who fall out of love… I DON’T. ALL I can share is that if a person is into huting you… Maybe they are oblivious to how you are being impacted by this or they obviously are not that into you. If you have a meaningful bond that has the potential… Keep working on the relationship. Ask yourself… Is being right more important than being loved??? xoxo

DEPRESSED GAY BLACK MEN??? REALLY???

Tammy Peay — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 06:57:51 +0000

I always thought Gay Men lived on the happier side of the gay rainbow. As if their biggest problem was being fabulous and fashionable. They always seemed to be healthier, happier and living the high life. I had always admired the lifestyles of BGM (Black Gay Men). We all see that they lived these fabulous lives with designer clothes, cars, vacations, villas etc. I was totally blown away when I learned about Depression amongst Gay Black Men. With the number of suicides on the rise… Something needs to be done to fight this silent killer. There are so many stressors in everyday life, The battles these men are facing seems to be he catalyst to start the downward spiral of depression. Imagine being so terrified of being outed, the threat of losing friends and family members weigh on you so heavy that suicide seems to be your only way out… That’s why we have to be supportive of each other because we never know who is in crisis and is crying out for a lifeline. Saturday, November 19, 2011 was the first fundraiser, Organized by Antoine Craigwell, Damal Edmond and Johnathon Paul Lucas. These men had the vision to entertain and enlighten the gay community about the silent suffering of Depressed Black Gay Men. I was honored to have been chosen to the host of the event. It was held at the Brooklyn Ethical Cultural Society Meeting House. People from all walks of life gathered to this historical building in the heart of upscale Brooklyn to show their support. We viewed videos produced by survivors of this silent killer. There was also the opportunity to bid at the silent auction. We also learned about the signs of depession. Antoine is also looking to raise funds to complete a documentary entitled…”YOU ARE NOT ALONE AT THE TABLE”. This unfinished work focuses on the pressures, pain and realities of GBM living in the darkness of depression. During the hoilday season we must embrace each other and try to create gatherings for people who will spend the holidays alone. If you or someone you know is suffering with depression, please rach out for help. Don’t suffer in silence. Please keep fighting and never give up. Please contact Antoine Craigwell @ DGBM2010@gmail.com to make donations to “YOU ARE NOT ALONE AT THE TABLE”. We must complete this work… Thanks in adavance for your generosity.xoxo

WOMEN AND JEALOUSY…

Tammy Peay — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 00:34:48 +0000

Whenever a beautiful woman’s walk into a room. Single men gawk and whisper, men with their companions are make every effort to sneak a peek at her. Women tend to get uneasy by her very presence and automatically deem her the enemy. Why are women so critical of each other? What are they afraid of? How is it so easy to dislike a total stranger? Why won’t they give her a chance? Is it her aura? Is it her physical beauty that has them intimidated? I think insecurity and self hatred are the culprits in these situations. We need to stop throwing daggers and throwing each other under the bus. Women should encourage each other and give positive affirmations regularly. I always compliment women and they always seem confused by this. I’ve realized that they don’t know how to accept compliments coming from another woman. It all starts with learning to love yourself inside and out first. Look at the beautiful package God gave you and celebrate your own beauty. Take time to fall in love with the Queen in the mirror. Look at yourself and note all of the good things about yourself. Do you have a great smile, beautiful eyebrows, long lashes, full lips or even one dimple??? Look deep into yourself on a daily basis and find positive things for you to fall in love with yourself. Every woman has an edge… It is to your advantage to learn yours. Fine tune your lure, learn how to approach people and make them say… “WOW, She is a great girl with a wonderful personality!!”. You can do this by being friendly, approachable, being very positive, generous with compliments, and giving direct eye contact with a warm smile. There are also certain etiquette needed… Never converse with a husband without first acknowledging the wife. Women need to feel that you are no threat. If the husband is too friendly… Only address the wife. She will see you are an alli and not a home wrecker. It doesn’t hurt to dance with the less attractive person in the group. This will make you seem human and considerate. Always pay your way, don’t allow people to pay for you. This will make people more comfortable around you. Always dress appropriately for events. Never go to an opera dressed like a pole slider looking for a few bucks. Having a good sense of fashion will make it easier for women to accept the new comer. I have no cure all for jealousy but I know that women should uplift each other. Try to be the friend you desire. Never hate her glory because you don’t know her story. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and fairness. Ladies, the cat fighting and bickering is tired and taxing. I’d love to see more unity in 2012. Lets start a new movement… DIVAS LOVING DIVAS. NO HOMO…LOL xoxo

LOVING A SMOKER…

Tammy Peay — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 16:47:11 +0000

Having been a smoker, I battled with quitting for months. I gained weight, verbally bashed loved ones and then I finally mustered up the courage to actually quit. It was the best gift I could have ever given myself. clean lungs and finally fresh breath!!! I have been clean for years and have never relapsed due to my fear of cancer and other lung illnesses. I didn’t know when I started smoking that it would take many years for the desire to smoke to subside. I know from experience that it is a very difficult battle, but I vowed that if I could quit… I’D NEVER, EVER SMOKE AGAIN!!! Enough about me and my battle with nicotine. Today, I am a non smoker who is married to a human chimney with chronic asthma. My spouse smokes throughout the day. It’s hard for me to get sleep because I’m always awakened by wheezing, coughing, labored breathing and what sounds like apnea. I sit up a few hours a night fearing the worst. I’m sick of smelling smoke, smoke lingering in clothes and hair, and even worse… being kissed with smokers breath. This has wedged a wall where even the most intimate moments are compromised by the stench of nicotine and smoke. To always have to understand that you are always going to be second to the smoking. I worry her health and mortality. I stress about watching her suffer with respiratory illnesses . It has taken a toll on me, disturbed my sleep, compromising my health and wellbeing as well. I love my spouse and I want a long, healthy, loving relationship. I am wondering… How long I can do this? What quality of life will they have? How will it impact my life? I married for better or for worse but this bullshit is definately the worst ever!!! If you are a smoker… Please be a considerate smoker. *Remember that your breath is lethal after a cigarette and If you mix that cigarette with coffee… IT’S TOXIC!!! *Smoke outside and wear your own clothing when you go out to smoke!!! *Thoroughly wash your face and hands after smoking!!! *Brush your teeth, tongue and gums after smoking. **When you are selfishly enjoying smoking your death stick… TAKE THIS TIME TO CONSIDER THE INNOCENT PEOPLE YOU ARE KILLING WITH EVERY PUFF OF YOUR BELOVED CIGARETTE!!! TO ALL NONSMOKERS… I’VE LEARNED THAT COMPLAINING WASN’T HELPING AT ALL. INSTEAD, I EXPRESS MY DISPLEASURE IN A POLITE WAY WITH LOVE AND SUPPORT. TOGETHER, WE CAN DEFEAT THIS AND I KNOW WE WILL… WISH US LUCK!!! xoxo

ARE YOU TOTALLY OVERWHELMED BY IT ALL???

Tammy Peay — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 15:25:29 +0000

Has your life become way too much for you to handle lately? Are you being pulled in all directions at once? Do you feel overwhelmed by all the responsibilities and deadlines? Has the bills, the family, the job and all of the expectations and responsibilities got you running in circles? Do you feel like it’s all too much for you too handle? Do you feel like walking away and never turning back??? I have been experiencing these feelings lately. I’ve been feeling like the weight of the world is on me and I can’t shake it off. I had been feeling a bit depressed due to the pressures of life. I needed to devise a plan to relieve my stress. I had unfinished projects, deadlines, legal matters, family issues, business obligations, bills etc. I desperately wanted my peaceful life back!!! I decided to write down everything that was hanging over my head on a list. This list was long and I knew it would take alot of time to get things back in order. I didn’t know where to start. I looked at my very long list… I noticed that some of these things could be resolved via telephone… I immediately made those calls to bring these matters to resolution. I then went to the things that needed to be done immediately. I readily addressed those things. I am still working on my very long list. I am now working on the things that can wait. I am addressing these items one at a time. I noticed that I instantly felt some sense of relief as soon as I addressed the first few tasks on my very long list. I still have a way to go but I don’t feel overwhelmed anymore. I now know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know that I’m not where I should be but, I’m NOT where I used to be. With that… I find peace that I now have a coping strategy that works for me. Now, All I have to do is hit the lottery and I’ll be good to go. xoxo

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING…

Tammy Peay — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 02:30:58 +0000

Do you believe in the power of positive thinking??? Do you have faith? The Bible says that if we have faith this size of a mustard seed… We can move mountains. Do you have that mustard seed? Do you believe in the “Laws of Attraction ” or the “Secret”? I had been working very hard in comedy clubs and doing shows for years. I was working but not getting the bigger gigs that I felt I deserved. I was ready for change, I felt as if I wasn’t getting anywhere even with all of my hard work. I wanted the main stages of biggest events in the community. I didn’t have a plan, but I knew and had ultimate faith and that somehow… I would be featured on these events. I knew which events I wanted on my calender and I marked them down as if I had been booked. I contacted a major promoter friend of mine in NYC. He is a legend and always very shrewd and straight to the point. I asked him about his excursions he was organizing that year. He told me, he had thought about me and wanted to book me!!! I knew things were changing!!! I traveled on an all expense paid trip to the caribbean with his elite group of professionals. He was so pleased with my show that he referred me to the another major promoter in Miami. The Miami promoter has a reputation of hosting the classiest weekend getaway of the year!!! I happened to be in Miami shooting a short film when I got his call. The Miami promoter booked me without ever seeing me perfom. He booked me based on the recommendation of the NY promoter. The Miami Promoter was very pleased with my show and referred me to another promoter who throws the biggest beach party in NYC!!! All of these promoters were on my calender!!! Since this. I’ve appeared in the in the NY TIMES, WASHINGTON POST, CURVE, TOM JOYNER SHOW AND GBM NEWS. I know this works… I’m in the process of making a new dream calender now. I look forward to seeing what the power of positive thinking has for me!!! Remember, to think positively and imagine yourself at the top of your game. Envision yourself driving your dream car and living in your dream home. See yourself being happy and living the happy life with your dream mate. I have even gone as far as to make a dream board. This is a board that has all of my dreams and aspirations posted on it. I look at it everyday and it keeps me focused on my goals. Don’t get me wrong… I’m not saying that if you imagine yourself winning the lottery it will happen… But you gotta be in it to win it. Meaning… Don’t just sit on your thumb waiting on miracles and good fortune appear. You have to do your part along with positive thinking, faith and works will set the wheels in motion for you to start attracting the positive things you desire in your life. xoxo